FAITH

Assalamualaikum geng blog...lama sangat tak post ni. Last was in october 2019..haha feeling helpsless wth my HO. Alhamdulillah, sekarang dah 7 bulan HO, Surviving lagi HO alhamdulillah. Now dah nak masuk third posting dah and i am going to medical. And this is my first posting ever in 2020. 2020 Such an eventful year, baru 1/4 tahun tapi dah dikejutkan dengan macam - macam berita. 2020 is CORONA year. Semua negara affected teruk kut. I cant imagine. Puasa dah tak ada terawih dekat masjid, bazar dah tak ada dan mungkin tahun ini tak dapat raya bersama famili. Tiba teringat last year punya wish. This year raya rumah mertua. This year puasa nak aim jadi lebih baik. Semua berubah 180 darjah. Semua orang kena stay at home. Semua kena pakai mask, social distancing, wash hands for at least 20 seconds/. Corona is global issue. Semua negera dia pergi. European, US most affected. Almost half million cases not reaching a month yet. Fuh. That is historical. Negara maju tapi buat apa pad...

bismillah, ya allah, I just want to cry.. I don't know what happened to me? currently being so demotivated.. macam blur, tak tahu nak buat apa ya Rabbi. things getting hard but my heart also rasa berat ya Rabbi. help me to go through this. I don't know what keep me being negative. I don't want to be a doctor, I want to help people but not through medical field. I am not free. all sorts of incompetence tu datang. the feeling of last pro exam really take me so much. people say try to love your job.... sigh.. I'dont know how Ya Rabb...it seems so hard to me, but you Al fattah..I know you brought me here, I know you will help me through this. even in my dakwah also, I am slow. i feel I am not your good abid. ibadah aku pun ya Allah..... aku tak rasa apa- apa.. aku rasa hati aku dah mati..aku lost dalam diam.... I don't know what you want to tarbiyah  me...but don't leave me ya Allah and don't make me leave you. I have nobody to hold on excep...

Bismillah All gratitute to Allah swt for every breath that He lend me all this while until today. For today's post, i just want to share all my feelings entering housemanship. It just started two weeks back with PTM and orientation. Get to know how my life would be this two years (If not get extended). InsyaAllah. Tomorrow I will be start tagging.(learn as much as possible). 7 am to 10 pm. So many things to worry, "what if i labelled patient wrongly." "what if anything happened, i will be responsible of. "what if..... so many 'what if". I am not even started. then i think of, why i not put all the worries to Allah swt. Anxious by myself would not go anywhere. Currently i am reading ' The art of letting God.' by Mizi Wahid. it is just so on point about surrendering to God, Allah swt. we plan but Allah already planned for us eversince we came to this world. everything happens for you, not against you. Sometimes we just need to u...

Assalamualaikum wbt. :) Hai semua ! Lama sangat rasa tak menulis dekat sini, dah habis belajar dah, yeay! im done. alhamdulillah ala kulli hal. the next journey begin. 24 tahun dah umur aku. ok, aku nak cakap pasal apa ea hari ni sebenarnya. sebab sekarang tengah duduk dekat hotel atas kerusi memang niatnya nak update blog, behabuk dah rasanya. Ini gambar waktu white coat. Tiba... Orait,next!, tak mau dah cerita dekat india, because it was undescribable, tibalah aku di bumi malaysia, the reality begin. The real journey begin. tak ada nak main perasaan sangat dah macam dekat India. alhamdulillah, baliknya aku dekat malaysia, i would not let myself floating, tidak ada buat apa-apa. Touch down sahaja dah ada program. Gathering Hubb. Conference, penyatuan fikrah dan jasadi dalam satu pertemuan. Seronok sangat rasa sebab ditajdid dengan benda yang basic tapi besar. kita nak buat dakwah ni sebab nak semua orang kembali beriman dengan Allah swt sahaja. What a powerful risalah,...

Bismillah.. " Sesungguhnya mereka(apa yang kamu sembah) itu musuhku melainkan halnya Tuhan seluruh alam, iaitu, yang telah menciptakan aku, maka Dia memberi petunjuk kepadaku, dan yang memberi minum kepadaku dan apabila aku sakit, Dialah yang menyembuhkan aku, dan yang akan mematikan aku, kemudian akan menghidupkan aku, dan yang sangat kuinginkan akan mengampuni kesalahanku pada hari kiamat. " ( 26:77-78) He is Al khaliq, Ar Rozaq, Al maalik :) I am super proud to have Him as my Rabb, the One who created me, the One who will sustained my life, the one will protect me, and I am proud Allah swt owns me. After 20 years of life, the unpaid oxygen I have used, the free 5 litre of blood circulating in my bodies, the eyes that if being sold for 1 million dollar, i will not sell it, the free dryer from the Sun, the free air cond at night(breathtaking air), the green leafy trees and grasses for pleasant eye freshner... All of them are gifts from my Rabb. FOR FREE! nothing i...

Bismillah :) It has been quite sometimes actually i did not write anything in this blog. Hehe, but i am still heere. Reminiscing moments in India. That one kept me stronger. Day by day. From the first year. Till now, 5th year already with all those ups and downs, yeah i guess i am getting stronger though. Huhh Narciss! Because The One up there always be with me despite of my thousand miles family in malaysia. I could make it. Day by day, months and years, I clearly can see how Allah build me up in His own way. Hamdallah for everything . Without iman and  islam all these are nothing. Through my journey, at the age of 20 I got to know the real meaning of life which i should have known by my youger age. Dah jadi rebung dah.. Tapi tapi..no remorse at all. Allah has destined my life to get his hidayah at that age.His ayah piercing my heart without border. Direct into the heart. Wherever my iman is lowering down, i would capture all those our first met. In surau, in halaqah....